I quietly put down the laundry I was folding, smiled a happy "I'll not loose my joy, I'll not loose my joy..." smile and went to see the damage. Wow, it was ugly and she hadn't puked just once, but three times all over the entry way and playroom. I asked Gabe to keep the little wiggler out of the mess while I cleaned it all up - this led to lots of crying on Abby's part and Gabe left mid-way cleanup in frustration. Somewhere, while cleaning up lots of puke while keeping said child and dog out of the mess, I lost my joy and chose to be grouchy. The grouchiness continued as my darling daughter cried and fussed for the next hour - wanting to be held, then wanting down, then wanting a book, then getting up and wanting water, then emptying plastic bowls out of cupboard, then running off crying because I'd sneaked out of the room. Finally, in frustration she began to pull off her diaper and I thought she needed to be changed, so I took off the soiled diaper and went in search of a new one - that is always a lengthy search in our house! When I arrived back in the kitchen I discovered that Abby had peed all over the tile floor and then walked right through it - so had the dog!
Sigh - not my day. I silently cried, "God I need my husband, why is he out serving while I'm here with grouchy, sick, ear infected, teething children!"
Sigh - yes I had a foul attitude, even my children were noticing by this time. I cleaned Abby up, noticed she had a fever and was constipated, gave her some medicine and Miralax and rocked my sweet baby to sleep at 10 am. I couldn't believe it was only 10 am!
I warmed my lukewarm coffee and turned to Colossians 1, I read through the first chapter and then went back to pray for my sweet husband, my prayer went something like this:
3John, I always thank God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, when I pray for you, 4 because I know of your your great faith in Christ Jesus and of the love you have for all God’s people (Especially Vietnam) — 5 your faith and love that spring from the hope stored up for you in heaven and about which you have already heard in the true message of the gospel 6 that has come to you. In the same way, I pray the gospel will bear fruit through the team in Vietnam and the message would grow throughout the whole country —just as it has been doing among you since the day you heard it and truly understood God’s grace. 7 You learned it from Andy Dixon, our dear fellow servant,[c] who is a faithful minister of Christ, 8 and who also told us of your love in the Spirit.
What a blessed woman I am to be married to such a servant whose life has truly been changed by the power of God's word and the obedience within his spirit.
I then did a little journaling about my sin in being frustrated with my children for things they couldn't control - in essence I was mad at them for "ruining" my morning and creating more work for me. Confession is such a releasing and freeing discipline that I'm still muddling through. Finally I closed my journal, prayed for grace to parent these energetic children and went to see how much their room had been destroyed and ask for forgiveness! When I walked in the boys room, they both smiled at me, showed me their airplane hangers and little city. Then Drew asked "Mom, you look better now, did you spend time with God and did he change your heart?"
Yep my son - I know its going to be a great new day, God's mercies are new each morning, even when the morning begins again at 11 am!
Walking with the Lord brings great joy when patterned with disciplines.